popping the posting cherry....

FUCK ME RUNNING!! I totes had the best blog post evar almost fucking completed, and then like a total dumbass I deleted it. Oh well. Here's try #2.

Ok, so I was joking around the other day with my friend Michelle, and I said I should start a blog about being broke as shit and all of the weird ass bizarro crap that happens to me and how I can still have a good time with no money and you can too! And she thought it was a genius idea, and so here I go.

I've been fighting with my student loan people for years, and now they finally have me by the short hairs, so for the next nine months I will be one hard working motherfucker. I've had 2 jobs for about 7 years, now I have a third one, and I am picking up side gigs and trying to come up with any money making scheme I can. I have my office job (more about that later, I'm sure), I bartend on the weekends, and now I'm doing random office and bookkeeping tasks for the bar as well. I'm also trying to pick up some commercial work and freelance wherever I can. Need someone's legs broken? Call me!
I'm also writing a play. I have written several short plays (two have been produced) and a bunch of short stories and other crap, but this current project is my largest undertaking. I figure that if I talk about it enough, a) I will actually get it completed, and b) people will come see it. Plus, I can get rid of some of my excess brain diarreah here and hone my razor sharp wit so I'm bringing nothing but my A+++ game to my play. The show is called Chapel Perilous. WTF does that mean, you might ask? Well, one of my favorite authors, Robert Anton Wilson (The Illuminatus! Trilogy), in his book Cosmic Trigger, referred to Chapel Perilous thusly: "in researching occult conspiracies, one eventually faces a crossroad of mythic proportions (called Chapel Perilous in the trade). You come out the other side either stone paranoid or an agnostic; there is no third way. I came out agnostic... like the Ego, once you are inside it, there doesn't seem to be any way to ever get out again, until you suddenly discover that it has been brought into existence by thought and does not exist outside thought. Everything you fear is waiting with slavering jaws in Chapel Perilous, but if you are armed with the wand of intuition, the cup of sympathy, the sword of reason, and the pentacle of valor, you will find there (the legends say) the Medicine of Metals, the Elixir of Life, the Philosopher's Stone, True Wisdom and Perfect Happiness." RAW also thought that the perfect on screen representation of Chapel Perilous is the movie 'Chinatown'. I happen to agree with him there, although there are many. I've always been fascinated with this concept, and I feel sometimes that I have been in and out of Chapel Perilous all my life. The show is loosely based on my experiences as a bar fly and a bartender. What really set this in motion, though - I was sitting at the Hub one afternoon with my friend Jason, and he said, "you know, you should write this show where we play twins." And I of course said, "evil twins!" And he said, "Fuck yeah!" And then that was that.
I'm also a member of Jobsite Theater, and I'll be in their next production, Night of the Living Dead. (That will add a whole new layer to the WTFness of my life. I'm going to have to schedule every moment of my day along with budgeting every cent. Guess I need to embrace my inner anal-retentive.) But I am very excited to be a part of it, there's so many people I love involved, and it will be super kick ass and lots of fun! This time of year sucks, though - audition time. It really feeds the ol' insecurities, let me tell you. More on that crap later, I'm not feeling like getting into it now.
Jobsite's current production, Pericles, is very rad and you should all go see it, if you haven't already. It plays at TBPAC until August 23. I consider it a real inspiration, as it was written by two local playwrights who are some seriously funny motherfuckers. I did ask one of them in a drunken moment of I don't know what to read Chapel Perilous when it's done and give me some pointers. I hope he doesn't make me cry like a little bitch.
Well, it's getting late - I'm off from job #3 tonight, so it's time to leave job #1 (I should be going to the gym right now, but... uh....), go home, cook dinner, have some wine, and commune with my darling domestic partner. Holler at y'all later, I suppose.